This....!

For a third time we decided to add to our family. Each time we've decided to add to our family it took time; two years for Kendal, and half a year for Peter. It was no different this time, but when months turned into a year my hopes fell again. We kept going, but to be honest the second year was a roller coaster, in which I tried my best to convince myself it just wasn't going to happen and I would be fine if it didn't. As we rounded on two years we felt it was time. Time to decide would we pause give ourselves a break, or would we just be done. With a lot of thought we decided to give it to this summer and be done. I began looking towards the future for myself. I applied for a part time job and if that didn't work out I was going start a preschool. However as per the norm God has his own timeline for us in life. Late May came and I wasn't convinced being late and feeling icky meant pregnancy. (I'd had the same thing happen countless times before never resulting in anything.) However, we were heading to Disneyland in early June so I felt it would be dumb to do Disney and all its awesome rides if I was in fact pregnant. I was shocked to see a positive pregnancy test. To be honest it took some time getting used to the idea we were having another child, when I'd spent the last year convincing myself we wouldn't get to, and the last month planning a baby less future. I cancelled my job application and felt bad I wouldn't be able to do a full preschool with Peter since I would have to take off near two months in the middle of the school year when the baby comes.
As usual we kept the news to ourselves even though I was convinced me skipping all major rides and acting off would tip off my family at Disneyland. But we had other fun distractions so I got away with it. We told the kids just after I was twelve weeks along. It took a few minutes to sink in for Peter then he was excited. Kendal was full of questions and skepticism (probably because we've told her for two plus years we may not have another child.) Once the questions passed Kendal was beyond happy. Peter keeps hoping with each appointment I go to the baby will come back with me. He's also offered to share his toys and underwear with the baby. Kendal loves to talk to my belly and tell the baby it will be so cute (She's really been hoping for a sister; Peter a boy).
We told family in the following weeks and are letting the news slowly leak out till the gender is revealed.
This pregnancy has been my roughest so far. Kendal was a no big deal, and Peter I moved on from sickness in my second trimester; however this time I've had more sickness, and have felt a lot more pain than either previous pregnancy. Plus my sciatic nerve is giving me a run for my money.
It's funny I've written for this post three times. My first thoughts were put down in mid spring. I was expressing woes and the fact that we were leaning towards being done. It was an emotional post and I had a hard time with it's content. I was planning on adding to it as we made our decisions final and mapped out the future. My second edit to the post was the initial reaction when I found out  that I'd gotten pregnant. In the post I expressed my, Joy, shock, and initial thoughts on our unexpected turn of events.The final edit is what's written. It's long, but I want it as a part of our story. It's memories to be shared and treasured. We are pretty definite this will be our last addition to the family. We've looked back on all that we've gone through to get to this point, and feel good with our decision that this will be our whole family. We are truly blessed and grateful we have two great kids so very very happy to have another one on the way!