Track season is in full swing

 We keep having bad luck with Pete's braces. So far in a month and a half he's had 7 brackets come off. This past week when number 7 happened I insisted we see the orthodontist. She could tell I was frustrated, but pretty much brushed it off and said it happens. I was fuming and wishing we could just go somewhere else, but when your insurance is double covering braces at only this office - we're stuck for now. They decided to put bands on Pete to force his jaw back. It's earlier that they should be doing this, but it was the only option the ortho gave to "help" the situation. 

Kenal had her a meet at the school for the deaf and blind the first week of April. It was a crappy weather day, and her back seized up during her first run and affected her second run so she didn't end her day with good times. This past week her meet was in Filer, her first run was decent, and her second was on the slow side. It was a hot and sunny day. We're hoping she can get in gear and step up these next few weeks without injury. (I wasn't able to make it out to Gooding because of work meetings, so the pictures are just from Filer this week.)

We had a relaxing couple of days watching conference last weekend. It was so good to hear the messages from the leaders of the church. 

- "We engage in God's work, not because God needs us, but because we need God and His mighty blessings. - Elder Shumway

- "He delights to forgive because to Him you are delightful." Your worth is constant. It never changes. It was given to you by God, and there's nothing you or anyone else can do to change it. Obediece does bring blessing-that is true-but worth isn't one of them." "You are not the voice in your head or the mistake you have made." Sister Ruina

Pete had his first meet this last week at Kimberly. Casey was chatting the night before about how good Pete is looking this year and he's excited to see what Pete can do. Pete got second in his 800 and mile. Third in Tripple Jump and first in his 4x4. He's looking forward to this next month of meets and seeing where he can get! 

I finished my TMT math class this past week. It was the last class I needed to take to get my teaching / Idaho certification. I just have to finish this school year with a mentor and I'm official! I had a hard meeting the first week of April that made me sad about the library's future in the middle school. New principal + teachers that don't want to do the program / the same thing has made things hard and we left with a lot of question marks and me feeling like my job was of little importance to the principal. I'm still processing that and what I can do going forward to better serve students when it comes to the library. I did get offered another 1/2 day position at the middle school so I will officially be a full time paid teacher at the middle school next year! I will be doing the exploring academics class (aka math help for struggling students). 

Kendal got awarded for good grades this past week! 

Our friends "Egged" our house this weekend. 

Thundercloud is in full bloom right now and It's just the best! 

We don't need a pet, we've got Pete. ; ) He make life interesting in his own ways. 

Nana

 My beautiful Nana has been an amazing presence and example in my life. I was asked to give a memory of Nana for the funeral and had a hard time of narrowing it down and keeping it brief. My earliest memories of my grandparents were when they lived at the cinnamon bear (calico craft store). From there they moved to Still Meadow in Wellsville. That house was so full of family, celebrations, and memories. From simple Sunday dinners, to sleepovers, cousin time, to family filled holidays that house holds a special place in my heart because the love that I felt there came from my Nana and Papa. Nana's most often recalled memory of me was finding hidden roll crusts behind couches in her home (what can I say. . . I hated hard rolls, I still wanted dessert, and I wasn't bright enough to use the trash as a little kid).

 I have so many memories of my grandma's store. From hiding and playing around the various rooms (Christmas, holiday, craft, kitchen, etc) to growing up and "working" there (aka dusting, vacuuming, and other various simple tasks) to earn jelly bellys, beanie babies, or other things sold there. 

Casey and I dated and got married towards the end of the still meadow years. (Casey even lived in the barn for a couple of months before we got married.)  My grandparents loved him and my Nana thought he was simply the best (which I think so too). 

Kendal is the only one who had time with papa since we moved and he passed not long after Pete was born. 

My kids know Nana from her time out in Nibley and at Legacy. We would go spend time with her to visit, play, and enjoy her company. They each have memories of her over these many years and we'll always look back on with fondness. Nana loved my kids unconditionally and that meant the world to Casey and I. She thought the world of all of her posterity. She prayed for and cared about us all. Her years after Nibley have been harder with to many hospital visits and broken parts to mend, but continue on she did. These past few years at legacy have been good yet hard, we know Nana would not be with us forever, but we were grateful for the time given to us to glean from her stories, wisdom, and heart. 

Nana has been an incredible presence in my life. I look up to her and am so grateful for her example and love. She loved the gospel and had a strong testimony and faith in her life. Her family meant the world to her and she served and loved them in all ways. She was truly the heart of her family. 

Nana has been a refuge for me, a source of comfort and endless love. I will miss her in so many ways and am grateful to have her watching over my family and I. Toodleoo and Luva, luva, luva you forever Nana. 

 

End of March

Alice had her last two swim classes on the 16th and 19th. She continued to pick up skills and has grown in many ways. The biggest thing we have to work on with her remaining passes is her endurance. She usually only goes so far and then wants to pause or rely on others to help her.

Nana had a bad fall on the 19th and broke three ribs she was hospitalized the next day. I got word mid Friday that he was not doing well and I should come down to Logan to say my goodbye's.

Kendal had her first track meet on Friday the 21st. Sadly Kendal walked in to give me her bags right when I was given the heartbreaking news from David about Nana. We both had a lot of tears, but I had to lift her up and send her on her way to her meet. She was struggling emotionally, but said that being out on the track running helped calm her down. She did the one mile with a time of 7:33, and the 2 mile with a time of 16:20. One meet down a month and a half to go we can't wait to see what she does this season! (Pictures courtesy of my sweet friend Shaylah that also took Alice from me while I was melting down so I could leave for Logan. - Vanessa later took Alice for the afternoon instead of having her stuck there for hours with Casey at the meet / practice.)

Broken hearted I drove down to Logan that Friday. That morning Nana had been in such a state and wanted to be done so it was decided to let her go. I wasn't prepared to say goodbye to my Grandma and was taken back when I came in to her room to find her in a talkative mood (just like she would be at home at Legacy). She spent the whole afternoon / evening talking with family, sharing her love and stories with us all. We were all emotional but so grateful for that time with her. I stayed overnight (David did for a long time as well). I only managed a couple of very interrupted hours of sleep before the morning visitors came in and I was up for the day. Because Nana had had such a long day of visits her night was rough with a difficult bathroom incident in the middle of the night. Nana finally got into a decent sleep mode around four in the morning and Billie and I had to shoo Dr's and Nurses away from waking her up for most of the morning to let her have some rest and peace. I ran to my parents for a quick shower and change before heading back up to the hospital. It was that morning that the Dr. was very blunt with Nana's prognosis and outcome. We knew with her injuries and impending pneumonia recovery was not going to happen, plus she was being life supported with a ton of oxygen. Saturday afternoon Nana was taken off of her heavy oxygen support. We knew it would take time for Nana to pass (with in the day or days), so we just waited. After a couple of hours Nana suddenly looked up and said they weren't ready for her yet. She spent the next couple of hours confused about why she was still there and saying they weren't ready for her, Papa wasn't there to get her yet, and that she wanted her garments on or she couldn't go. She seemed on the verge - kind of in between two worlds. She even asked me once where she was and I said the hospital to which her reply was "o bother" in her known grumpy tone. Those two hours made us question our choices to let her go because according to her maybe she wasn't ready. We felt like we were giving finality to her life and it was so hard to accept that. Nana fell into another rest period and never really was up enough to talk or give coherent replies from then on. Late Saturday night her breathing was so heavy and labored it hurt to watch her suffering they started to give her more sedation and pain meds to ease her way, but it broke my heart to watch. We all stayed pretty late. Billie, David, and I stayed on while Wendy went for a brief time and came back. David left around 3 in the morning when Billie, Wendy and I were all "snoring" and Nana's levels weren't dire yet. We were given levels to watch as Nana declined and different things to watch out for. So after about an hour and a bit Wendy woke and thought Nana had passed (she had been snoring a long with us). Vitals told us she wasn't there yet, but it wouldn't be too long. We messaged Aunts and Uncles. Us girls circled Nana and just watched and held onto her. Tony, Lisa, Sally, and eventually my Dad came in we all witnessed the end as Nana passed. I had my hand pressed to her to feel her heartbeat and watching those last breaths / ending was so very hard. Sadly Linda missed her passing and it was so sad to see her and everyone's tears and heartbreak. We spent the morning wrapping things up and waiting for her body to be taken. I hit a point of fatigue that I knew I had to go back to my parents to rest. I cried some more (my tears were a constant thing for those few days) and then crashed for 5 1/2 hours. 

Because it was spring break I stayed in Logan to do whatever I could for family and funeral prep. I felt underutilized and missed my little family something fierce but stayed anyway. I helped pick out the temple outfit for Nana with Linda, my mom, and Tony's girls. Thursday evening I helped put together bags of Jelly Belly's with Luva, Luva, Luva you tags. (Jelly Belly's were a memory from the store my grandmother ran, and Nana would always tell us the phrase Luva, Luva, Luva you to us.) Friday morning I went to Snowville to get me favorite people. Kenny had driven them part way and I picked them up there to come to Logan. Friday afternoon David's crew, Katherine, and my crew set up the church for the funeral lunch, and cleaned a bit. evening many of us got together to eat out and see family. Saturday morning we set up the memory table at the church and mingled with family at the viewing. The funeral was so good. Everyone shared wonderful messages and thoughts and the music was beautiful. I gave a tearful family prayer, and Kendal played the piano for the Grandkid / Great Grandkid song. Alice had a hard time stopping the tears during the funeral and we were all emotional. Thankfully the rain stayed away while we made our way to the cemetery. After some time there we went back to the church to eat and spent the afternoon surrounded by family. After cleaning up the church we had a laid back couple of hours at the house and then joined some of the adult cousins out for a bite to eat. 

 

spring break Mon- Boise go carts, reptile museum, jump time, yonutz, tue - swim, wed - hands on Gemstone, Thursday - took them to RR, 

Monday - Boise - Go carts, Jump time, reptile museum, yonutz

Tuesday - swim

Wednesday - Hands on, Gemstone Climbing, Kendal at YW's